Sternr's Complete Programmer Tutorial

Many people ask me, "sternr, how can one be like you - such a brilliant, funny yet good looking programmer???" ,

Well my friends, I decided to do my duty to man kind, and reveal my 10 steps to become a hardcore programmer!

Sternr's Complete HowTo Tutorial for Becoming a Hardcore Programmer

1. You're not a programmer, you're a Software Engineer.
And a damn good one if I might say.

2. There is no combination of upper-case letters you haven't heard of.
You simple know it by its earlier code name.

3. The Dual Buzzword Principle - Use as many buzzwords as you can.
but beware - there is a small and extincting specie of bold programmers who might ask you to explain what it means.
But even these rare few will not dare to ask twice - and here comes the duality principle: always save a backup buzzword to explain the buzzword.

4. Every design\idea that is not yours has a flaw.
If you cant find it, than it's a security hole - and besides, you would've done it differently...

5. NEVER argue with the Sysadmin - unlike the programmer next door, he really know what he's talking about.

6. Your code is NOT complex and hard to maintain.
It's simply flexible. very flexible.

7. The future is here - advice and talk as much as you can about technologies & products that still have no release date.
You cant be contradicted, yet no hard question can be asked - the design is not final...

8. Install a Linux on at least one of your computers.
You don't have to study, like or use it. but you must have one.
Note: It is recommended to say once a day (don't overdue else you'd be asked questions you cant answer) why you prefer Linux

9. Command Line - Use it as much as you can.
Everyone knows its stupid, but it looks impressive.

10. This is the last, but most important.
In the Hi-Tech industry - and IT especially, people are measured by 2 things and 2 things only: Self Confidence, and Experience.

It is very unfortunate (one might notice that this has nothing to do with how smart or good one is...) but true.

And because of it, it doesn't matter how much or what mistakes you do, its simply how you react to them, its how you react in meetings, and especially under pressure.

So simply stay cool.

Like me ;)